How to meet, date and marry Italian successful, rich, single men: Finding a boyfriend or a husband

This essay sums up my previous articles. If you missed them, you can read this one.

Summary

How to meet, date and marry Italian successful, rich, single men: Finding a boyfriend or a husband

Are you seeking a long term relationship with a hardworking, diligent, intelligent, trustworthy Italian man? Do you love countries rich of history, art, culture, fashion, food, nature, music? Would you like to live la dolce vita in Italy and being immersed in the timeless infinite beauty that this country can offer? Are you fed up with dating apps? Are you tired of being single? Do you believe that life is not meant to be lived alone? Have you ever dreamed of a wedding in Italy or in another beautiful place in the world? Do you love to travel the world?

If you answered yes to at least one of these questions, keep reading.

Looking for men in Italy and dating single Italian men: Dating culture in Italy

In Italy, the vast majority of the population — except for immigrants — is 100% Italian: all of their ancestors lived in the area that, nowadays, is known as Italy. It goes without saying that if you want to date real Italian singles, you must live in Italy and start looking for men in Italy. On the other hand, very few Italian-American born and raised in the US are 100% Italian or have lived in Italy for a long period of time. Sadly, I even met Americans who became Italian citizens a long time ago and don't speak fluent Italian yet.

Anyway, what you probably don't know is that… dating doesn't exist in Italy! You can’t really date an Italian man or woman. In Italy, dating a person means that you are in a relationship with this person (not necessarily a long-term relationship). In North America and other Anglophone countries, dating is a phase that usually precedes a relationship proper. Also, it is not uncommon to "date" as many people as possible, until you find the one you want to start a relationship with. On the other hand, in Italy you don't usually "date" anyone: people meet through their friends, relatives, work etc. and then decide to start a relationship if they are both interested. Dating as many people as possible is almost always frowned upon and considered inappropriate behavior. Therefore, make sure to adjust to your new Italian life and the Italian dating culture. And don't forget: when in Rome, do as the Romans do. Literally.

Living or getting married in Italy: is it viable? Do I need to be rich?

The reality is that living in the most beautiful places of Italy is expensive. It is no accident that only rich artists, such as George Clooney, can afford a decent lifestyle in Italy or a decent wedding in Italy — Venice, in his case. Tom Cruise's third wedding, celebrated in a castle not far from my house, was absolutely gorgeous, but certainly not cheap. More importantly, wealthy men — or women — especially world-famous actors and singers, have no trouble getting a visa, simply because they can buy a permanent one for €500.000 (about half a million US dollars). Anyway, it is a known fact that only the wealthy could afford to travel and live overseas without much hassle. On the other hand, even dreams have their drawbacks: in fact, any rich man, or rich woman, will soon realize that Italy has one of the highest tax burdens in the world. This is a great way to upset your rich spouse.

Also, you might want to answer these questions:

  • Do you speak Italian?

  • Do you know the Italian culture, and its 3,000 years of history?

  • Do you know how to dress in Italy? (Don't underestimate this, especially if you are a lady…)

  • Do you know how to pay the taxes while you are in Italy?

  • Do you have a job in Italy?

In the meantime enjoy this beautiful Italian commercial I worked for (Calzedonia: Life Is a Journey) with Julia Roberts. Filming locations: United Kingdom (Scotland, part 1), France (Paris, part 2), and more importantly Florence (ending), which just happens to be the city she chooses to live in because the view is breathtaking:

How to find an Italian boyfriend, or possibly a husband: tips

In theory, the best solution is going to Italy and starting to look for a good guy. Regardless of the outcome, you will definitely enjoy the myriad beautiful places that Italy has. After all, we are talking about one of the most beautiful countries in the world.

However, why not invite a real Italian man to your hometown? Some Italians are willing to move, as long as they don't lose their job or they can find a new one. It can be a great way to date and get to know each other. Also, you could go to Italy and Europe — Paris/France, Madrid/Spain, London/England, you name it — on vacation together with him whenever you want: all these places belong to the same area (smaller than the US).

A common misconception is that Italy has some places where singles meet. I have received emails from ladies asking «Where do I find a husband in Italy?», «Where do I find a boyfriend in Italy?», «Where are all the available men?» or «I want to marry an Italian man: how can I find a good man?». In other words, they wanted an "address" where they could find a man. The reality is there is no such thing as a specific place (or places) for singles in Italy. Other countries may have this concept, but not Italy. In theory, any place can potentially be the good one, as long as you are fluent in Italian and therefore able to communicate and get to know people. Having the highest number of romantic getaways in the world, Italy is a great place to find a nice man to date, to have a serious relationship with, or to marry.

Granted, if your name is Juliet, you live in Verona, and your boyfriend is called Romeo, your love life may not be that easy though.

Getting married in Italy: how do I marry an Italian man, technically speaking?

While Italy is one of the most beautiful countries in the world, if not the most beautiful, it is also one of the most bureaucratic. Everything requires you to go through a lot of red tape, all the more so if you are going to get married. This is very different from the mentality of the US or of English-speaking countries in general. Requirements for foreigners, US citizens included, are strict. In addition, you don't even speak — or read — fluent Italian, so you draw your own conclusions.

That being said, you don’t have to worry: I will take care of everything quickly. I get paperwork done every day, in Italy and abroad. Not only am I familiar with the Italian legislative system, but unfortunately also with Italian bureaucracy.

Italian guys: dating Italian men in person or online dating?

Everyone would like to live la dolce vita in Italy, which is also the best way to date an Italian man. But if you don't have enough money, or you don't have a visa, you could try online dating. Finding a man online is possible, but the main drawback is that online dating is not very common in Italy, and the few Italian dating websites or apps are not as popular as they are in America. More specifically, dating apps are usually considered garbage, and most Italians prefer to meet people in real life without online dating. Besides, distance is going to be a major problem in the long run: you will necessarily have to travel or invite him sooner or later. In fact, some people confuse international dating with long distance relationships: although I love to travel internationally, in my opinion long distance relationships are not even relationships. Two people should be together and get to know each other. International dating means that two people want a real relationship by expanding their horizons and looking for a significant other outside of the usual group of local singles.

Does online dating work?

First of all, this page is not about online dating, but real dating. This page is not the usual "man seeking woman" profile either. That being said, dating websites and apps, excluding the usual fake profiles created by the site/app owners just to fill the database up, are full of "people" who — with a few exceptions — don't talk, much less travel. I still wonder what they are doing there. Sex workers are not rare though, and, in this case, we all know what they are doing there. So, yes, online dating might work well if you need short and superficial sexual relationships, assuming you are lucky enough to get them for free: most likely, you will not get anything at all, and your time will be wasted anyway. This is because dating apps and websites are conceived to retain as many trapped users as possible: if everyone found a partner right away, nobody would need to use the app or the website again! Basic marketing. And to add insult to injury, they will ask you to pay for silly "premium" services.

Curiously, the most popular "dating" app is Tinder, which is also the most ridiculous. Other apps have been trying to oust Tinder for a long time, unsuccessfully, despite plenty of fake ads and plenty of alleged "happy couples" who met through the nth new app and are now married with kids etc. Needless to say, none of these hypothetical couples say where they are from, where they live, or their real full names. Do they exist? Sure, in the imagination of the publicists.

Mind you, in theory it is possible to find a serious person on a dating app/website, but in practice it is extremely difficult. Being a complete waste of time, in my experience it is not worth it.

Myths and misconceptions

Italians only want sex

It is not uncommon to come across blogs that try to support this argument. The typical complaints are: «Attractive Italian men only want sex», «Italian men are so cute, and cheaters», «Handsome Italian men are players», «That hot Italian guy was a total jerk». The reality is: they never describe any real evidence, let alone statistically significant scientific and/or academic data. Occasionally they may come up with a "survey", conducted by their favorite magazine or website — not exactly scientific and/or academic sources. Most bloggers, usually American ladies, tell their own experiences or their girlfriends' experiences: in brief, they didn't manage to maintain a relationship with their Italian partner — or didn't manage to start one at all — which is why they are still very upset. Anyway, I don't doubt they might have had a bad experience and I respect everybody's opinions… but they are just opinions, more often than not belonging to frustrated people who generalize their failures, and project their own inability to build a long-term relationship onto others. The rationale is: «We broke up? It’s because every Italian man is an idiot and now I hate them!» Curiously, they don't have an American man either, nor do they have a French man, a Spanish man or whatever.

On the other hand, people like the Clooneys enjoy the unique beauty of Italy without ranting and raving or wasting time on Internet forums, blogs or Facebook. Quite a different approach…

As a matter of fact, compulsive cheaters and/or sex addicts can be found anywhere in the world, not necessarily in Italy. Aren't there any cheaters in the US, to pick just one example?

Seeing Italians as "sex machines" — for better or worse, depending on one's preferences — is obviously a distorted picture of reality. In any case, what you will not find elsewhere is… the place: Italy is unique and, believe it or not, this may improve your sex life too: do you think that a romantic weekend in Italy would harm or benefit the couple?

For what it is worth, my suggestion is: you can make the most of Italy (and Italian men) but it all depends on you. Choose the right person, bring out the best in you, don't blame others for your own failures, and choose the right place — which doesn't necessarily mean living in Italy all the time: the world is much bigger and there is a lot to see. Your success is in your own hands: if you are looking to date with the intention of and the willingness to commit to a long-term relationship, invest your time in getting to know someone who is also seeking the same, and you will not be disappointed, no matter where your partner comes from.

Are you successful and do you prefer elite international dating?

We all know that distinguished elite professional women want to date successful men. But we also know that it is not easy to find the right person. Well, don't be too picky, otherwise you are going to argue with everyone. In any case, a successful professional doesn't give up easily, is diligent in his or her work, ambitious, smart, intelligent, educated, and patient. For example, I firmly believe it is possible to find this kind of person. No matter what your job is, I will value it and you will always have time for your career. I love my career and I want to date a woman who loves her career too. However, I will prioritize the relationship with my partner by finding a balance, and so should you. Having the same goals is the best way to make a relationship work.

Incidentally, being successful doesn't mean being rich. Should I get a rich woman who does drugs, or cheats on me, or has a shallow personality — not to say personality disorders — or has the maturity level of a spoiled kindergartener? No thank you, in this case I would be better off alone. I wouldn't let this kind of millionaire woman go out with my dog, much less with me. I am happy with my life and I want to complete it, not ruin it through something that I don't need.

Also, as a former pro marathon runner and a person who has always been passionate about running, I tend to avoid alcoholic drinks — with a few exceptions, such as low-alcohol beer or wines: Italy has delicious ones, sometimes containing strawberries or cherries — nor do I use drugs of any kind, which would result in immediate disqualification, or tobacco. Lots of sports-medicine academic articles describe how alcohol may lead to dehydration, may decrease uptake of glucose and amino acids by the skeletal muscles, may alter the body's energy supply, and may impair metabolic processes during workouts. In other words, if you are looking for a man who you can get drunk and smoke weed with, don't bother me. My healthy lifestyle is more important than someone else's addictions.

Are you looking for a rich man to marry? Advice from a rich bachelor

Well, you need a sugar daddy, not a partner. It is natural that you want to find a partner, or a man to marry, or a man to have a baby with, but if you don't know what the word love means, a rich man is not stupid enough to become your husband, unless he has serious mental problems. If a man is smart enough to be successful, he is also smart enough not to get played. A relationship is about feelings and common goals, not money. Through money, you won't get anything, let alone security. Your money-hungry behavior actually shows your very insecure personality. Indeed, a bank account will never make you happy. If the contrary were true, banks would be sources of happiness… which they are not: do you remember the 2008 crisis, for instance?

Single and married millionaires in Italy

What is more, the Italian taxation is just crazy, so be careful before trying to find a rich husband in Italy. It is much better to do what famous international celebrities such as Clooney, Pitt, Cruise and many more do: residing elsewhere and going to Italy on vacation whenever you want to. Clooney, Pitt or Cruise are not Italian citizens, but I decided to do the same despite being an Italian citizen. Why not sweeten the pot? Lately, Mark Zuckerberg has been doing the same, and unfortunately so has Kim Kardashian, who married her third husband in Florence.

Speaking of the richest young husband in the world, the CEO of Facebook Mark Zuckerberg was supposed to deliver a keynote address on "technology entrepreneurship" in Rome. Well, I was there on purpose. Too bad he couldn't care less about technology entrepreneurship: after some useless trivia about «the Facebook community» he left in a hurry to go on a dinner date with his wife and then go sightseeing.

Insight from a self-made rich woman: looking for money or looking for love?

Being a great lover of classical-symphonic music, I don't usually listen to other kinds of music, unless I have reasonable commercial grounds for doing so. Times and technology change, but pop (or rock etc.) music remains one of the traditional cash cows despite the current competitive global market. Anyway, while I was walking home after leaving the opera house, I came across a tune by Lana Del Rey that was like:

Will you still love me when I'm no longer young and beautiful?

…a short yet eloquent question which makes a good point. This is what love is all about. Food for thought.

And don't forget that money is just money, while love is priceless. It doesn't take a rich man/woman to be rich, happy, and content. What it takes is loyalty, trust, most of all communication and the willingness to compromise. Somebody to share the struggle, the good, the bad, the best and worst times without breaking bad. Now this is what I call love.

What I would change in a stereotypical relationship with a rich partner

Priorities

If you want a rich husband, you have to realize that you will never be the #1 priority in his life. Work will always come above you. Money will be above that. So you’ll have to settle on being #3 at best. Why would you ever want to settle on being #3?

False. That is the typical bachelor’s life. When one decides to find a woman, the bachelor days are over and she must be his priority.

Long business trips

If a rich husband travels a lot, he is more likely to cheat on you, regardless if his age: after 30, after 35, after 40 or whatever. (For the record, the wife could cheat on him as well in the meantime, but this is another story.)

False. Firstly, no mutual trust means no love. So, don’t get a husband or boyfriend who you don't trust. Secondly, there is another simple solution: being together at home, and traveling together. The keyword is: together. In a real relationship, both people take the initiative, not just one.

Being busy

A rich spouse is always busy. No time for you.

False. The word busy must not exist in a relationship. The priority is the partner. Or at least this is my mindset — I realize other people may well disagree and behave differently. In any case, if either partner claims to be busy, the relationship is definitely unhealthy. This is also true before a relationship: people who say they want to get to know a person, but are busy all the time, are in conflict with themselves.

What I would NOT change in a relationship with a rich partner

  • Most successful men are self-made (apart from the puppets who inherit everything). As a result, they keep on working to make their dreams happen, never taking for granted what they have, no matter their age: after 25, after 30, after 35, after 40, after 45, after 50, always.

  • Most rich men are self-made (apart from the puppets who inherit everything) and they strongly do not believe in entitlement. Nothing is deserved which is not earned. Given this type of stance, sometimes they can be very harsh on those who are receiving some type of assistance from the government, friends, or family members. Men also want to see that a woman is independent or on her way to being financially independent through self-struggle.

  • Every rich — and intelligent — man hopes his woman loves him for who he is as a person. Intelligent men will never be chumps who have to pay for companionship — hiring an escort, or going to a strip club, would be a quicker solution. As soon as a rich man feels the only reason why a woman is going out with him is to scrounge a dinner and a show, it is over. I am not sure if I feel worse for the women who change who they are to chase a rich guy, or for a guy who may not ever know if his girl is there for him or just his cash.

  • Nothing turns a rich man on like a strong woman who is successful in her career or business. However, she doesn't have to be rich. Instead, she can be superbly talented in something that he is not e.g. musical instrument, language, singing, dance, cooking, art, sports, etc. If you can master just one art you will gain a tremendous amount of admiration.

Single Italian man looking for a serious relationship

Curiosity is one of the forms of feminine bravery (Victor Hugo)

My name is Giuseppe, which is the most popular Italian name. I was born and raised in Rome, Italy, but technically I am now a resident in the Caribbean, where I like to spend the winter, or at least what is called winter in the northern hemisphere, that is to say tropical summer. I studied in Rome and in Cambridge-Boston, MA. As a businessman and investor, I mostly work in Paris and Monaco in France, Rome in Italy, Manhattan in New York City with short stays in the US Virgin Islands, which are my favorite islands, California namely San Francisco Bay, Atherton, Santa Barbara, Los Angeles-Beverly Hills, Santa Monica, Orange County, Huntington Beach and Newport Beach, Seattle in Washington, Dallas, Austin and Houston in Texas, Boston in Massachusetts, Miami, Palm Beach, Tampa and Orlando in Florida, Aspen in Colorado, Park City in Utah, London in the United Kingdom, Switzerland namely Zurich, Berne, Geneva and Lugano in Ticino, Vatican City, Madrid and Barcelona in Spain, Dubai in the UAE, Singapore, Tokyo in Japan, Moscow and Saint Petersburg in Russia — see also my locations — though I always love to work remotely from a Caribbean island or the countryside of Italy: a true paradise without cars or traffic! My favorite places in Italy and Europe — not necessarily in that order — are Capri, Amalfi, Positano, Sicily, Rome, Florence, Tuscany, Milan, Venice. Besides, I often visit my family in Italy, where I own property. I am 41 years old, single, I don't have kids — but I love them — and I have never been married.

If you want to get to know me, I look forward to hearing from you, especially if you are a businesswoman, investor, executive, international financial advisor, international lawyer, or if you have an international perspective just like me, but also if you think we can get along for other reasons and you want to tell me about them: write me a message explaining why you want to get to know me. Unlike most dating websites and apps, contacting me is actually free, but it doesn't mean that I have time to waste: I want to meet a potential partner and I don't need to chitchat with random people online. I prefer a determined and goal-oriented woman, who knows what she wants!